Clutter

Countless thoughts fill ones mind and like clutter there is need for decongestion except like most things its easier said than done. At the very root of it is only one but like a stem follows after to branch out it has with it all these leaves and flowers and seed still trying to decide whether to live or wither and die.
Madness, I'm now starting to believe must be self inflicted. Because its madness to let thoughts turn obsessive to the point of affecting the physical and everything else. For the resident pessimist its cruel and unusual punishment when all roads lead to doom and gloom. Never waiting for the happy ending you know too well will never come you punish yourself with short doses or happiness like shots of tequila that only serve to get you sick and regretful after.
I wonder though, is it possible to get through even half the load if all you have to lean on is your own understanding of things? Possibly but unless you are a one man band or some form of island that is far from possible. In any investment, money, health, insurance, lationships etc etc there's always the other side to look at before an informed decision is made. Otherwise its like running blind or buying a Cologne when you have a cold, its ambitious but not effective.
So your mind is never unclogged at this rate and that either leads you to running down the street, shutting it all down and moving on or growing indifferent. Indifference should be one of those admirable traits in a human, just because with all the raging hormones its one of the hardest things to accomplish. At some point even trying is painful because you may never figure it out. All you build is a case of assumptions and even the optimist will agree thats the mother of all that's wrong with society. That and television. A few lessons sooth the heart telling it that not all is a total failure; honesty- to self and others is freedom for the soul. Sometimes that's all that matters.